Why Labeling Emotions Helps Children Self-Soothe
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Children experience emotions intensely, but they often lack the ability to express or manage them effectively. When a child is overwhelmed by anger, fear, or frustration, they may act out, withdraw, or struggle to communicate what they are feeling. Teaching children to label their emotions is a simple yet powerful tool that helps them manage their feelings and behaviours more effectively. Scientific research shows that when children can put words to their emotions, they gain greater control over their responses.
What is Emotional Labeling?
Emotional labeling is the process of identifying and naming emotions. Instead of simply feeling overwhelmed, children learn to say, "I'm feeling frustrated" or "I'm nervous about this test." By doing so, they shift from experiencing an emotion unconsciously to processing it in a way that allows for self-regulation and problem-solving.
The Science Behind Labeling Emotions
Research in psychology and neuroscience highlights why labeling emotions is so effective. Dr. Matthew Lieberman, a neuroscientist at UCLA, discovered that putting feelings into words reduces activity in the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for processing fear and strong emotions. At the same time, it increases activation in the prefrontal cortex, which is involved in reasoning and impulse control. In simple terms, naming emotions helps children shift from reacting impulsively to thinking more clearly and responding thoughtfully.
Similarly, Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, an expert in emotion science, explains that children with a more developed emotional vocabulary experience less emotional distress because their brains can more efficiently categorize and regulate emotions. When children lack the words to describe their feelings, they are more likely to express them in disruptive ways, such as tantrums, outbursts, or shutting down.
How Labeling Emotions Supports Self-Regulation
Naming Emotions Reduces Emotional Overwhelm
When children say, "I'm really angry right now," it helps them process their feelings rather than being consumed by them.
It shifts emotional responses from the reactive brain (amygdala) to the thinking brain (prefrontal cortex), allowing for calmer decision-making.
It Helps Children Communicate Their Needs
Instead of crying, hitting, or withdrawing, a child who can say "I'm feeling left out" can ask for reassurance or support in a more constructive way.
This fosters better relationships with peers, parents, and teachers.
Enhances Problem-Solving Skills
When children can identify their emotions, they are more likely to come up with effective coping strategies.
For example, instead of acting out in frustration, a child might say, "I need a break because I'm feeling overwhelmed."
Strengthens Emotional Resilience
The more children practice labeling emotions, the better they become at managing difficult feelings over time.
They learn that emotions are temporary and manageable rather than scary or uncontrollable.
How Parents and Teachers Can Support Emotional Labeling
Model Emotional Vocabulary:
Use emotion words in daily life: "I’m feeling a little frustrated because I lost my keys, but I’ll take a deep breath and look again."
When children see adults expressing emotions constructively, they learn to do the same.
Validate and Name Their Feelings:
Instead of saying "Cheer up" try: "You seem sad, would you to talk about it?"
This teaches children that all feelings are normal and acceptable.
Use Books and Stories to Introduce Emotion Words:
Reading books with emotional themes can help children connect feelings to words in a relatable way.
Ask questions like, "How do you think the character is feeling right now?"
Play Emotion Games:
Activities like "Feelings Charades" or "Emotion Flashcards" can make learning emotions fun and engaging.
Encourage Reflection:
Ask open-ended questions: "What made you feel happy today?" or "What was a tricky emotion you felt?"
This helps children build awareness of their emotional experiences.
Final Thoughts
Labeling emotions is a simple yet science-backed way to help children regulate their feelings, improve communication, and build emotional resilience. By teaching children to recognize and name their emotions, we give them a powerful tool for managing life’s challenges with greater ease and confidence. Whether at home or in the classroom, encouraging emotional vocabulary is one of the most effective ways to support a child's social and emotional development.
